I was unaware that April 10th was Siblings Day. I did not know that the Siblings Day Foundation believes that establishing Siblings Day will benefit of families, communities and the nation just like Mother’s Day and Father’s Day. This new knowledge got me to thinking…thinking about siblings separated by foster care.
According to the Foster Care Alumni of America website, over 2 million American children live with grandparents or other relatives because their parents cannot care for them. When relatives provide foster care (known as kinship care), siblings can often stay together. Kinship care also improves stability by keeping displaced children closer to their extended families, their neighborhoods, and their schools.
Generally speaking, significant relationships for children in foster care are broken and often their siblings are their only important attachments. When siblings enter care together, they can feel a greater sense of stability and experience less grief and anxiety than when they are alone. Siblings can be each others’ caretakers, comforters, protectors, and role models. Studies show that when siblings in care are separated from each other they experience trauma, anger, and an extreme sense of loss.
The reasons siblings are separated varies including lack of agency resources, individual children have diverse needs that cannot be met in the same placement, shortage of homes willing or able to foster large sibling groups, or to prevent further abuse or trauma (emotional, physical, or sexual abuse by a sibling).
Siblings should remain together whenever possible. There is a growing push for workers to honor sibling connections and follow the same practice guidelines for sibling separation that is followed when helping children deal with separation from their parents. This includes efforts to maintain frequent contact through visits, phone calls, and letters.
Nicki Sanders, MSW, Chief Visionary Officer
The Teen Toolbox provides youth portfolio development and civic engagement and academic empowerment strategies to help teens set goals for life after high school and create a road map to reach those goals through its PACKAGED FOR SUCCESS™ Programs. We are committed to supporting and raising awareness about the needs and potential of teenagers in the foster care system.
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