Here’s Why Women of Color Leaders Must Choose Sustainable Success
For as long as many of us can remember, leadership has been synonymous with performance.
We’ve been praised for our productivity, our resilience, and our ability to get things done – at all costs.
Especially for Women of Color leaders, this expectation has become a silent burden.
We’ve been taught to push through.
- To keep proving.
- To excel without pause.
But what if leadership was never meant to be a performance?
What if leadership is really about preservation, not just perseverance?
When Performance Comes at a Personal Cost
Just like in our homes, Women of Color are often expected to be the pillars in our workplaces – strong, capable, and always available. We become experts at achieving, at supporting everyone else, at solving problems. We make magic happen.
But in the process, we often neglect the most important relationship of all — our relationship with ourselves.
We sharpen our leadership skills but rarely get the space to check in and ask:
- Am I doing well?
- Am I settling?
- Am I leading in ways that nourish me or deplete me?
There’s a gap in traditional leadership development:
It focuses on personal and professional growth but rarely personal and professional well-being.
It values what we produce but overlooks what we need to preserve.
It emphasizes how we serve but rarely considers how we must also be served.
This is how burnout sneaks in.
This is how self-betrayal becomes normalized.
This is how we lose ourselves.
But here’s the truth: You don’t have to sacrifice yourself to succeed
You Can Lead Differently!
You can build your leadership capacity without abandoning your humanity.
You can pursue growth without chasing perfection or approval.
You can lead in a way that strengthens you—not one that slowly erodes you.
Soft leadership prioritizes impact, integrity, and innovation.
Soft leadership centers preservation, wholeness, and sustainability.
You deserve soft success – the ability to lead, liberate, and live without burnout or self-betrayal.
Soft success isn’t about shrinking; it’s about standing fully in your power and defining success on your terms.
I Carried It All Until I Couldn’t
I know this journey intimately. It took me decades to reach this soft life and career phase.
As a high-achieving, social work-trained leader, I carried the weight of unrealistic expectations for years. I checked every box, climbed every rung, and wore my resilience like armor.
On the outside, I looked successful. On the inside, I was quietly exhausted.
It wasn’t until I hit my breaking point that I realized:
- I was leading in ways that were costing me my peace.
- I was excelling but eroding.
The signs were everywhere: illness, accidents, sleeplessness, irritability. I was trying to pour from an empty cup.
My body – and my spirit – forced me to make different choices.
- I had to stop betraying myself to maintain someone else’s version of success.
- I had to choose preservation over performance.
- I committed to lead in ways that honor softness, center self-care, and stress wholeness.
Now, I support other Women of Color leaders to do the same.
Rewriting Your Leadership Story
- Imagine connections that inspire softness.
- Imagine success that doesn’t hinge on self-sacrifice.
- Imagine leadership that feels like coming home to yourself.
- Leadership that prioritizes your well-being.
- Leadership that amplifies your influence without erasing your identity.
- Leadership that allows you to grow without grinding yourself down.
It’s not just possible for you. It’s available to you right now.
What would leadership feel like if you stopped betraying yourself to maintain it?
Let’s Build It Together
If you’re ready to step into leadership that’s built for you and by you – without burnout and self-betrayal, I’d love to connect. Send me a message or schedule a free consultation to explore what leadership can look and feel like when it finally centers you.
YOUTUBE VIDEO: Leadership Is About Preservation, Not Just Performance | Sustainable Success for Women of Color
Nicki Sanders, MSW, is committed to career development, professional development, and organizational development. As Founder and CEO of Nicki Sanders Leadership Consulting, her mission is simple – to eliminate toxic workplaces by developing skilled, empathetic, and goal-oriented leaders who have the vision, support, and resources to create a culture where business prospers, and employees thrive individually and collectively. Nicki has an extensive background in nonprofit management leading high-functioning, multi-disciplinary teams, volunteer recruitment and retention, and social impact programming. She is a thought leader dedicated to dismantling the outdated, narrow view of social work and an accomplished professor, coach, trainer, and group facilitator who has combined her gift for authentic relationships, Master of Social Work degree, and over 20 years of diverse work experience to create a life and career aligned with her values and purpose. She is a lover of nature, cupcakes, travel, and 80’s hip hop and R&B music.
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